Providing Service?

OK...I'm throwing this out for public comment, cause I'd love to hear some of your views.

Some of you know the full story, for others, here is a brief synopsis. I grew up singing in the church. I love it -- I find it the most complete way I can worship. Four years ago, when my church started it's contemporary service, I was asked to "produce" it. I did so willingly, even though I wasn't using my primary gift. I "retired" after three years and started singing with the band at the same service. Singing with the band -- leading worship in this way -- is one of the most fulfilling experiences of my week.

Now the band we have for this service has gone under many changes, trying to find the right personnel and sound. A while ago, it was decided that the band would be paid, so that more "control" could be put upon them, in terms of quality. So when I started singing with the band, I assumed a paycheck would be headed my way too. It didn't turn out that way. When it finally came to a head, budgets were already turned in and there was nothing left to pay a female singer. Although I was hurt and could have used the extra income, I realized that my relationship with Christ was far more important than a paycheck, and I continued to sing....

Then the lead of the band was switched out for someone who has a bit more charisma and experience. My Sundays were cut from every week to every other, so his wife could sing in the off weeks. I welcomed the opportunity to attend other services in the church and worship with friends. Also, it was too difficult to sit in the service that I helped build from scratch and not be in "work" mode. Thoughts like, "are the ushers ready?" and "are the back doors shut?" would invade my worhship.

Then came the e-mail about mandatory rehearsals. Now, I'd been going to rehearsals when they were sporadic, but they weren't very productive. If you know anything about bands, they aren't the most punctual, efficient people in the world. It would literally be an hour after rehearsal started before the first note was played...and then it would mostly focus on the instruments -- not the vocals.

The mandatory rehearsals are two hours every Thursday night. When you sing every other week, that works out to four hours of rehearsal for one performance. Even when I was working on my music degree, I never had to put that much rehearsal time in. So I contacted the leader and explained that I'm more than happy to come to rehearsals for the weeks I sing, but it's asking too much to make those of us who aren't paid attend mandatory rehearsals.

I was told that this was a ministry and that exceptions couldn't be made for anyone (even though everyone else who is non-paid came in after this leader took over and knew these rules from the start), that rehearsals are a time of fellowship (even though the rest of the band is mostly men under 24 who like to discuss things like...the ultimate fighting championship) and that I need to fully commit or step down from the band. He also mentioned that he didn't think I was committed because I wasn't there on my "off" Sundays.

So, here's my dilemma: Do I commit to this as well as all of my other commitments and get stressed out because I'm overbooked, or do I quit some of the other commitments I've undertaken to do the one thing I love, or do I give up the one thing I love so that I can keep my obligations to others?

PS -- somethings wrong with bloggers spell check...I apologize for my horrible spelling.